Ryanair: leave the extras on the ground.
SO I flew to Glasgow with Ryanair for a fiver.
It was one of those rare fares when it really was a fiver so as a result I got to miss out. Big time.
I missed out on the delightfully wallet-busting smorgasbord of fees which the ‘low fares airline’ likes to dish out as ‘optional extras’ to its adoring passengers.
Here is how I missed out:
I missed out on the “taxes and fees” which the airline imposes on some fares but not others. How does that work then?
I missed out on the £5 web check in fee – the charge the airline imposes for you to use your own computer, printer, paper, ink and electricity to print your boarding pass.
I missed out on the £5 Administration Fee because I paid for the flight with a piece of plastic called an Electron. (Ryanair now charge a fiver for passengers who want to pay with plastic electrons)
I missed out on the £4 “priority boarding” fee – this is the extra passengers pay to queue for longer so they can get on the plane first.
I missed out on the £40 “airport boarding card re-issue fee” which is charged for passengers who misplace the boarding passes they have already paid a fiver to print out at home.
I missed out on the £20 “infant fee” as I was unable to find a child under two years old to fly with me.
I missed out on the £50 it would have cost me to check in two bags online or the £105 it would have cost me to check the same bags in at the airport.
I missed out on the £10-per-item “infant equipment fee” as I don’t own or travel with infant equipment. (£20-per item if you don’t book online)
I missed out on the £40-per item sports equipment fee (£50-per item if you don’t book online) and the £40-per-item musical equipment fee (£50-per item if you don’t book online).
I missed out on the £55 fee to change my flight at the airport and finally
I missed out on the £150 name change fee. This is useful if you entered someone else’s name on the ticket when you booked it online and then decide to enter your real name at the airport.
So I got to travel for a fiver but had I been an infant-carrying, credit-card using, name changing, sports playing, priority-boarding musician who opted to check in a couple of bags at the airport I could easily have paid £500 more.
PS. Ryanair now have so many fees, charges, and optional extras that they have helpfully collated them all on a Table of Fees for your perusal. It is a bit like a menu or a wine list and is, I understand, updated quite frequently.
